prose

Visual Blight

I wonder how long I will have to look myself in this mirror

Red lips and brown eyes
(Black holes where a soul should be )
Until I can convince myself
This isn’t where I belong

I can’t remember the last time I knew
The girl with the red lips and the brown eyes
That is staring back at me

She doesn’t speak to me anymore
The one with the soul
The one with stars in her eyes

That notion of a person has walked on
Kissed the back of my neck
And left to touch heavens door

The air is thick
I cough blood to the thought
Of breaking my own arm to live free.

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we are lilacs and daisies
twin flowers

there is just something magic about you
and the way your laugh falls into the air
feather light

you move delicately
even when you feel like you’re crashing down
petals upon petals
Raindrops on hot summer pavement

i have missed you so much i forgot how it felt
to lie on the floor of your bedroom
or lean into you on the couch
giggling about boys
& trading paperbacks

thank you for waiting for me to come back.

Dormouse

Do I exist in a way of light?

Do I mean something for this universe?

This is a restricted garden

and I am forced to bleed

picking roses from the stem,

I fear missing any of its sweet beauty, as it is all I have

I wish to travel further than steel doors that keep me

I have clipped every flower

counted the roses 1000 times

what is left?

what joy was I going to find here?

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It’s somebody else
With red hair maybe, long flowing
With pale blue eyes and milky skin
She stops me in my tracks
She stops me like love
But I do not come to her for love

It’s someone else
You work with him
Dark in demeanor, cool to the touch
He smells of charcoal & sex
And purrs as he writhes in the pleasure

This isn’t to be facetious
I simply cannot help myself

I have resisted my temptations
And given into every impulse
I have employed both sided of the coin
Yet the final outcome is always the same

I am addicted to the taste of debauchery
There is mischief and hell following behind me like a clean up crew

It’s someone else
As it always is
And I fall into step with the devil herself

She always comes back to me
To whisper in my ear & mention all the fruit I have missed for my mouth
I will not stop until my tongue is dripping with the wet juice of peaches & limes.